Siteseeing: Why Women Hate Pictures of Themselves

As this article puts it, “we’re photographed more than ever before”.

This is something that I take to heart when I’m photographing a bride or bridesmaids. Many women, in this stage of everybody and their mother owning a digital camera, are constantly on call to think about how they will look in a picture. The author of this article writes, “knowing how awful you’ll look in a picture, that this is the image strangers and future generations will have of you, adds a stress level that invariably sabotages the shot”. I felt this way when my wedding photographers were taking shots of me, alone, in my backyard, holding a bouquet of flowers and wearing The Dress. What will my future kids think of what I’m wearing? How I’m standing? What if I get contacts down the line and nobody recognizes these pictures of me with glasses?

The vast majority of couples I work with open an engagement portrait with the line, “We’re not good at getting our pictures taken”, or “We’re really awkward in pictures”, or “I never look good in photos”. You are not alone in thinking these things. I have had only one couple who was 100% comfortable with how they looked and moved in their photos on their wedding day. The rest? They’re just like you and me – a little nervous, a little doubtful, but at the same time we’re willing to put some faith in our photographers.

My wedding photos came out great. There are some where I have a weird smile, and some where I wished I’d turned my body a different way. The rest? I love. I’m confident that if you talk to any of my openly photo-conscious clients, they will feel the same way about their photos. There may be a strange blink or open mouth – but there will always be a snap of laughter and the genuine you showing. While I’d like to take credit for that (ha!), I believe that it’s the trust that my clients put in me that make these things happen – you know you’ve hired a professional, someone whose job it is to make people look good in pictures. You know that you like me (at least I hope you do, if you’ve hired me!) and I like you too (a great deal!) and we’re going to make some beautiful pictures happen.

The author ends by writing, “And so we become more and more fearful, and we take more and more pictures, hoping that this next one will be the one that shows us who we really are and want to be — but validated through the objectivity of a lens.” This is where I hope the journey of picture frustration ends for you – with my lens. I disagree that the lens is objective, and I believe you’ve hired me for my subjective lens and eye. And I’m confident that what we’ll capture together is something that IS you, and you’re going to really like it.

Article here.